Heads up! Here's some profile mistakes to avoid
Not getting as many messages or responses as you’d like? The problem may not be what you're sending in your message, but your profile itself.
Whether you're a seasoned online dater, or new to the game, everyone can use a refresher of what not to do. We’ve previously talked about how to create a profile that will get you dates, however the don’ts are just as important to discuss as the do’s.
Know that we come from a place of love and support. We understand that the process of online dating comes easier to some than others. We’re here to help.
Fitafy is all about healthy people finding healthy relationships, so we want to make sure your romance starts off on the right foot.
So, let’s talk online dating profile mistakes to avoid.
PUTTING MINIMAL EFFORT INTO YOUR PROFILE
Writing “HMU on Instagram” and leaving your handle is not going to cut it. This should be obvious, but it’s still worth mentioning. Most people are looking for a partner with the ability to commit and follow through … barely filling out your dating profile immediately excludes you from that group. You’ll either come across as not taking it seriously, or lazy … neither of which are ideal partner traits. Think about it, if someone can’t even take the time to complete a dating profile, it probably speaks volumes about the time and effort they're willing to invest in a relationship…
POOR CHOICE OF PHOTOS
People have to be able to see what you look like when it comes to online dating. Being deceitful about what you look like is certainly not going to help establish a relationship built on trust and honesty – both of which are vital to healthy partnerships. Your pictures need to be current (within the last year), clear (not taken with a dodgy camera) and clearly show your face and body. While you may love your crew, and that’s awesome, try to keep group shots to a minimum. If all of your photos are group shots, you’ll be hard to distinguish, and people may quickly move on. Also, we know that you work hard, but consider limiting the number of ab selfies you upload. You're on Fitafy, we know that you're interested in health and fitness.
BEING TOO GENERIC
Statements like “I like to have fun” or “I love hanging out with my friends” do nothing to help people understand who you are and what you enjoy doing. Remember to have fun with it! You're not trying to appeal to everyone. A statement such as “my ideal day with friends is spent at the dam, water-skiing and barbequing while blasting The Growlers” gives potential matches a lot more information to work with. A little effort will go a long way and can make it easier to segue into a conversation.
LACKING SELF AWARENESS
Requesting that matches “don’t be crazy” or be “drama free” is unlikely to get you anything but an eye-roll. Talking negatively about past relationships or using statements like the above only makes you appear jaded and emotionally immature. Keep it positive. Our purpose is to help kickstart positive relationships. If you're not at a stage where you're ready for that, that’s ok, but hold off joining until you are.
BEING OVERLY PICKY
It’s great to know exactly what you want in a partner. However, there’s a difference between ‘wants’ and ‘needs’. ‘Wants’ are preferences, while ‘needs’ are the deal breakers. If you're a non-smoker, smoking might be seen as a deal-breaker. However, wanting a partner who is as well-travelled as you, is just that, a want. On your dating profile, it’s absolutely ok to list some of your deal breakers (though, be sure to do it kindly). Be cautious about including a long list of ‘wants’ as you may end up excluding someone amazing who meets all but one of your criteria.
NOT USING ANY KIND OF FORMATTING
Avoid large walls of text and break up your responses into smaller, more easily read paragraphs. Keep in mind that most people will be using their phones, which have smaller screens. Punctuation, spelling and grammar are also really important. Using complete sentences and correct grammar goes a long way.
WRITING TOO MUCH
We spoke about putting in minimal effort and writing too little, however, you can also include too much. Carefully consider what you're including. A few sentences or even a paragraph per question is plenty. Remember, the aim of the profile is just to open a dialogue, you don’t need to go into crazy detail (save that for when you meet up in person!).
NOT UPDATING YOUR PROFILE
The truth is that it can take time to find the right match. Plus, you’re constantly in a state of change. That’s part of what makes life so exciting. You may develop new interests, move areas or decide that what you're looking for has slightly changed. Make sure that you update your dating profile to reflect your ever-changing state!
It may feel like there’s like a lot of moving parts to creating the ‘perfect’ profile. Try not to become overwhelmed. Nothing is permanent and you are free to go back and make changes in the future.
If you approach creating an online dating profile by being kind, respectful and open-minded, the chances are you're going to smash it out of the ballpark anyway. Don’t stress.
Now that you're versed in what to avoid and be wary of, go forth and create a profile that puts your best foot forward!